The dog likes the baby bump

My dog (Brooklyn-on left) enjoys my new baby bump. At night she has started to snuggle up against the bump, when I'm on the computer, she finds a way to cuddle on my disappearing lap. Why this sudden interest? Don't assume it's LOVE, I'm pretty sure she's just figured out the tummy is warm. 
 I did some research and discovered that it's very common for dogs to be jealous of a new baby. The experts say things like; Don't let the dog in the nursery! Play baby crying noises! Did any of these "experts" ever ask the dog? Here are 3 tips to stop the evil green monster that Brooklyn wants me to pass along.

Tip 1 - I am the only one allowed to sleep in your armpit in the big bed. That's unsafe for the baby. 


Tip 2 - If an apple chunk falls on the kitchen floor, don't feed it to the baby. I'll take it so we can avoid the choking hazard. 


Tip 3 - The newborn must be taught to throw a squeaky ball before any other life skill. Throwing squeaky balls is more important than talking, reading, walking... 

You think you're soooo funny...

I was just telling someone yesterday that I haven't felt the baby kick yet. She seemed very concerned and said, "I feel mine kick all the time! My husband loves to put his had on my tummy to feel him." I said, "Nope, no kicking here maybe they are just lazy." Now, I have seen baby x's feet move so I know it's possible, I just haven't felt anything. 
 As I slept last night at 1:30am the kid nailed me. It felt like a little foot trying to karate chop a balloon. I woke up out of a dead sleep. As I tried to fall back a sleep, I discovered the little one likes Law & Order SVU and kicked a few more times - hard enough to make my hand move. So the kid has bad timing but good taste in TV drama.

You Look All Pregnant and Shit

I now believe pregnant women receive the most backhanded compliments than another human. It's not the other persons fault, sometimes they don't even know they are being RUDE. Recently, a women who knows Potter (baby daddy) said, "Ohhh, don't you hope it looks like him?" Ummm hello? Are you saying my gene pool is defective?
 The compliments are just different when you're about to be a mom. For example, any expectant mom will tell you clothing shopping is a whole new self esteem experience. Yeah - yeah, you're growing a human being, hitting the gym and watching what you eat for the sake of your little one BUT you want to look as good as possible. You want to show off your legs and your newest accessories that suddenly make men more polite. (READ: GIGANTIC TA-TA'S) Is it vain? Hell yes. But it's true, you want someone to say, "You look fantastic!" Even if it is a dirty guy at the gas station and he's talking to your Grand Canyon of cleavage. 
 I was at one of my favorite stores (Ross) and I took a few dresses into the fitting room. When I came out to do the twirl in front of the "big mirror" the attendant was checking me out. I thought I looked OK but this is what happened next. 


HER: Nuh uh babygirl, don't get that...
ME: No?
HER: No, that makes you look all pregnant and shit.
ME: Well hell, we wouldn't want that.
HER: No offense...I'm just sayin'.
ME: Actually, I am 5 months pregnant.
HER: Oh! OK then, work it mama!

Baby Sign Language Class

I have always been interested in early childhood communication so today I took a baby sign language class. I took Potter too and that might have been a mistake. I learned a few basic baby words and the following...
1. Never learn sign language from a book, watch someone doing it in a video. 
2. Starting at birth, pick about 5 signs (for a pre-verbal kid) and do every-time you say the word. Like - Eat, Drink, Dog, Finished, More, Help and Potty.
3. Always sign with the hand you write with (when doing single signs). 
For some reason Potter is now signing to the dog, I think he missed the point of the class. 
The book/DVD - Baby Sign Language

Still Scanning Pics

Why did I think this was a good idea? In Nov. we decided to go 100% digital, that means scanning every picture we have ever owned. This is fantastic in theory but it's quite the project to make happen before the baby arrives. We are realistic, we have hundreds of pictures of Brooklyn (dog) we can only imagine how our inner Annie Lebowitz will come out once the baby is here. I have been tear apart old scrapbooks and thought I'd share some of the gems.

Nope, Not May

 I have been told not to show this pic to anyone over 55 - it creeps them out. My due date has been pushed up to late April and I have not purchased 1 baby thing. I don't think I will until March. BTW - That's almost 2 weeks earlier than originally estimated. From now on I think they should just give out "Due Weeks" so we first timers are better prepared. I did get the anatomy scan done, Potter was sick so he missed it. Going to the OBGYN in 2010 is like a health class every visit. A little scanner can show so much! During the live DVD portion of my visit, I saw the babies heart pumping blood, the bladder and lungs working - it was amazing. 
 I told the tech, we don't want to know the sex. She said, "I can edit out the stills but not the DVD and trust me, everyone will see a penis on anything anyway." She explained even if it's on the forehead some knucklehead will say, "That's his thing right there!" So basically, if I really want to know, I can watch the DVD. I brought it home and Potter immediately took it and put it in a envelope and made me sign the back so I can't break the seal without his knowledge. Little does he know I already replaced the DVD with Paul Blart - Mall Cop so if I really feel like watching it, there's nothing he can do. I am sure seeing a penis on my child's forehead is better than Paul Blart.

Sad Radio Day

Today, we were released from our on air duties at 1079 The LINK in Charlotte. With the current climate at The LINK, this has been something we have been planning for, so it's not a huge shock to us. The funny thing is, I called my mom to tell her what happened, and she said - "oh did you get escorted out of the building by some huge security guard?!" She was disappointed when I told her, "No, there was no manhandling of the pregnant chick." This is the way our business works so we have no hard feelings towards the LINK. I'll admit, it's odd not being on the air everyday but we have plenty to do right now BB (Before Baby). 

Christmas in Cincy

4 1/2 months - Christmas in Cincinnati has been great so far. Potter's mom is sick so she won't go near me but it's OK. I decided to take my diet into my own hands on the drive out and pack salads to eat. Even on the road, I cannot bring myself to eat a chicken sandwich. Ehck. It was hilarious watching Potter order a huge cheeseburger and I was sitting there chowing down on my little salad. I am sure some people were thinking, "Oh she's one of those girls." Speaking of food, I am waiting for the cravings to hit but nothing so far. I do kind of miss sushi. 
 We just opened gifts and stockings - it was a marathon! Somehow people got my memo, no baby gifts please. It's not that I'm not grateful but I have no storage and don't know what I need or want for the kid yet. I did get a few baby books from a friend and I love books so that's OK. My gift from Potter was amazing. Not to gush but he's pretty kick ass. Shopping and New Year's Eve in Chicago! See pics of our getaway here here - http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=136878&id=676862209